Thursday, April 23, 2015

Parenting Theory vs. Reality

Theory: Mix colorful veggies in with your child's pasta or eggs.  They'll love picking out and eating the brightly colored pieces!
Reality: Mix colorful veggies in with your child's pasta or eggs.  They'll love picking out the pasta and eggs to eat, leaving the veggies behind, picked clean.


Theory: Fill a bin with oatmeal or rice and let your child pour, sift, and stir with cups, spoons, and other kitchen tools.
Reality: Fill a bin with oatmeal.  Your child ignores the tools and immediately picks up handfulls to fling everywhere.

(Nothing a vaccuum can't fix...)

Theory: Your child will enjoy having a toy in their crib that plays calming music, soothing them to sleep.
Reality: Your child will love being rocked to sleep.  In the middle of the night, they will roll over on top of the calming-music toy which will immediately turn on, startling them awake.

Theory: Clean their nose out with a bulb syringe to help them breathe. 
Reality: Attempt to clean their nose out with a bulb syringe, while your child flails around screaming so loudly that the neighbors consider calling Child Protective Services.

Bonus! (for the Twin Parents)
Theory: To get a break and some sleep, take turns with your partner on handling the night shift.  You'll all do better with a little bit of rest
Reality: Laugh.  There is no break; you have twins.  No one is ever rested but the babies, who are somehow still full of energy the next day.

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