July 1, 1987-January 14, 2012
I had all of these different things to write about. The trip to Boston that Tyson and I took earlier this month. My birthday adventure, on January 13th. I was even going to write about a delicious "instant" chocolate cake recipe that I found.
Instead I am writing about something I never, ever anticipated.
We unexpectedly lost my cousin, Jeff, on January 14th, 2012.
There are really no words.
Both Tyson and I still have all of our grandparents, aunts, uncles, etc., etc. Everyone is even relatively healthy. This was definitely something that rocked our-and everyone's-worlds.
One of the hardest things for me to wrap my head around is that Jeff will never be 25. You have to understand, we grew up and were only 6 months apart; we were always the same age, experiencing the same things at the same time. And I turned 25 the day before he passed. It is unreal to me that he will never be 25.
People talk about grief. Well let me tell you, I have never seen grieving before last week.
People also talk about love and comfort. I have also never seen love and comfort like I saw last week.
"God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way, and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea."
January has been a very long month.
And Jeff, I hope you have figured out what the heck ballboarding is by now.